her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I got inside last night via doggy door
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
