Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I understand Curling. That high.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
