fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
