I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
