I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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