Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Randomize
