And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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