i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
