i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Do vagina's smell?
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I take back everything I said about communal showers
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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