Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
pray to the hookup gods
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
