Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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