His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
