So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
