I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
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