So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
