I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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