he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
