I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
