Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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