Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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