can we get nightvision for the apartment?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
