He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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