The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
My feet surprised me
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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