You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
