i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize