I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
