Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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