Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
