p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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