Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
