Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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