It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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