EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
