Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
