So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Randomize
