It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
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