Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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