I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
