Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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