yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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