she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize