Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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