yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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