singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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