he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize