so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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