either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Randomize