It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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