Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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