Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
home. puking in laundry basket.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
