I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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