Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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